A VIVID DESIRE

Why do people take such a pain to fall in love? Is this relentless pursuit worth of all the time and money or is it a mere manifestation of human nature to value things those are hard to attain or is it a compulsive attempt to fill the void inside that has stayed vacant from an early age.Whatever it is, I call it addiction. A disease that bites like a snake and spreads like a poison.
                                                                             I can sense the same subtle yet substantial change in myself. For it has become a habit now, to come back after work, place a chair in the balcony and disappear in the sparkling lights of the concrete forest that surrounds me. I talk to myself for hours ,listen to music so religiously that even a small pause in between would spoil the show.I love to play it hard and loud, it helps me ease the pain.I keep the lights off , because lights and tears don't really fit well together. With every moment the scale of contemplation goes deeper and deeper. The surrounding shadow engulf me, bit by bit, and leaves me in a slur. I wonder if I am trying to squeeze too much out of my life,much than it has to offer, or if I am merely standing for my right . The right that is the most  fundamental of all, the right to love and to be loved.